Arrogant Worms The Assumption Song Ukulele chords

The Assumption Song Ukulele by Arrogant Worms

Each chord should be strum twice (including the intro), the time signature is 3/4 
and should feel similar to a waltz "1, 2, 3, 1, 2, 3..."

Intro: C

         C          C
There was an old farmer
         C        G
Who lived on a rock
        G         G
He sat in the meadow
     F
Just shaking his
 C           C     
Fist at some boys
         C           G
Who were down by the crick
      G           G
Their feet in the water
       F      
Their hands on their
C           C
Marbles and playthings
        C        G
And at half past four
       G           G
There came a young lady
    F
She looked like a
C            C
Pretty young creature
    C           G
She sat on the grass
    G              G
She pulled up her dress
        F     
And she showed them her
C           C
Ruffles and laces
    C            G
And white fluffy duck
    G            G
She said she was learning
  F
A new way to
C            C
Bring up her children
   C              G
So they would not spit
          G           G
While the boys in the barnyard
     F
Were shoveling
C          C
Refuse and litter
      C          G
From yesterday's hunt
          G           G
While the girl in the meadow
    F
Was rubbing her
C           C
Eyes at the fellow
C           G
Down by the dock
   G             G
He looked like a man
       F
With a sizable
C           C
Home in the country
       C              G 
With a big fence out front
          G            G
And if he asked her politely
      F
She'd show him her
C          C
Little pet dog
         C         G
Who was subject to fits
      G          G   
And maybe she'd let him
      F
Grab hold of her
C            C
Small tender hand
       C           G
With a movement so quick
     G               G
And then she'd bend over
    F
And suck on his
C         C
Candy, so tasty
     C         G
Made of butterscotch
    G                G
And then he'd spread whipped cream
    F
All over her
C            C
Cookies that she had
     C          G
Left out on her shelf
       G             G
If you think this is dirty
        F           C
You can go fuck yourself!